What Are We Building Here?

What is jofty's Corner? Happy Holidays! Preview of Empathy Missive.

You, my dear reader, deserve stories, tips, perspective, insight - and I hope you have already come to expect all of those in our short time together. I am coming to the conclusion it may be healthy for me to make writing here on Substack a more reliable part of my life. This seems like a serendipitous¹ combination.

I’ve said I don’t know what we’re building here yet. Since then, I’ve said it seems we are building a place for reflection and healing. I dig it. Let’s figure out what that means; and let’s not pigeonhole ourselves, either. 8^)

When I started writing here about a month ago I explained what I hoped to accomplish and why this felt like the right time to start. All of those reasons still ring true, and now I have more. Just a few comments and interactions with you have shown how my work here is helpful, and also how my writing is not the only reason to be here. You have provided insight helpful to others in this space, and for that, I thank you.

I have a feeling we will learn much from each other as we go forward.

Setting personal boundaries, primarily writing time constraints and pacing, is something I need to work on here. I want to share leadership lessons, personal mental heath victories, dig deeper into topics like Stoicism, Empathy, Solitude, Reflection, and whatever concepts we find worthy, relevant, or perhaps most actionable and potentially helpful going forward. I feel oddly drawn to long form writing but I’m starting to recognize this journey here is about much more than weekly 4,000 word posts. It is also a marathon and not a sprint.

Alas, though I love this, I can only write so much. :)

One of the sticky-notes on my PC tower. This one is effective motivation to remind me that writing is a big rock now. :)

For now, I beg a little grace as I continue to find my voice through form, topic, quantity, and pace. I will always strive for quality and prioritize it over quantity, and…

I will keep posting something every Saturday. 8^)

Thank you for being here for the start of this journey. I am grateful to have you along for the ride.

Take care,

- jofty 8^)

Happy Holidays, Safe Travels, and Good Luck!

If you are reading this much of my writing “Good Luck” is probably an appropriate sentiment this week. ;^p

If you are travelling, I wish you safe travels.

Regardless, I wish you and yours a happy holiday season.

If we don’t chat again before Wednesday, then I wish you a Merry Christmas as well. 8^)

Empathy

Empathy will likely be the topic of my next ‘serious’ Saturday missive and you should expect it on January 4th or 11th. It is far from ready, but I am confident enough of the trajectory of the piece to offer you a peek behind the curtain. I feel Empathy was the biggest loose thread left from last week, specifically how it ties into Stoicism for practical application in daily life.

I had a visit from the good idea fairy a couple days ago when I was away from my keyboard and recorded some thoughts that may help complete my ‘essay’ on empathy. I think once I weave those thoughts in with the words I wrote this week I should have a solid foundation to fully form my perspective on empathy in a coherent manner deserving of your time and attention.

For now, I offer you a vague outline of what I think I’m trying to tie together.

With so many ways to address a broad topic like empathy, simply nailing down a few key concepts to explore and understand has been a challenge. At this point, one thing I’m starting to see is that employing empathy in daily life may be similar in practical application to the I Let My Dandelions Grow concept.

When it comes to applying empathy in daily conversations, the key may be a default mindset shift from compassion or sympathy to empathy. Curiosity seems to be right there in the mix, and I encountered that word frequently during my Stoicism research as well. Perhaps I’ve become too programmed to believe I should try to help others when they aren’t asking for and don’t want it. Perhaps I should default to letting other people’s dandelions grow.² Deliberately, actively switching my mindset to one of empathy or curiosity has been helpful already, and I look forward to sharing some examples.

The catch is, I’m starting to believe true empathy is a much more finite resource than sympathy or compassion. If my ‘empathy tank’ is running at a sub-optimal level, it is probably important to be deliberate in my allocation and application of it. Curiosity may be a similar and effective mindset to tactically employ when empathy resources are low.

These concepts are taking me some time to refine, so thank you for bearing with me as I work them out more fully to avoid sullying your inbox with incoherence.

Your thoughts can help steer my research and this conversation. Feel free to contact me or leave a comment below if wish to add to the conversation. :)

And that’s it for today. Thank you again for being here.

Happy Holidays.

Merry Christmas!

Take care,

- jofty 8^)

1. This Beer. Easily in my top 5 ever. If you can find it, it is a unique experience.

2. There may be another similar concept of ignoring dandelions in my head. I get distracted by my own thoughts frequently at inappropriate times - like when I’m having face to face conversations with people. That was never a serious challenge for me until recently. Writing is helping contain my thoughts, like a pensive, but perhaps when they do run wild I could learn to ‘let them grow’ and come back to them at a more appropriate time. Professor McGonagall clearly didn’t appreciate being ignored, even though Dumbledore was listening, or at least trying to.